My big fat weight loss journey

My husband and I have recently started a local Biggest Loser program. We are required to attend weekly meetings that involve weigh ins, measurements, lectures, workouts and Bible studies. Through all this, I'm learning that I have to stop letting food manage my feelings. I used to be bored, sad, happy...etc. and would treat that with food. Normally that included a 9x13 casserole dish. Now I have to walk away from my addiction to comfort food and actually deal with my feelings. It sucks!

Over the last 10 years of marriage I have gone from 142 lbs to 256 lbs. Through three pregnancies, a miscarriage, two healthy births and 6 months of bedrest, I have not put diet and exercise at the top of my list. I consoled myself with food with our lost pregnancy. Then I celebrated the next pregnancy by eating more food. I celebrated her birth with food...same with the next child. I woke up one day and couldn't stand to look at myself in the mirror. I've never been the gorgeous prom queen type, but I think I used to at least pass for super cute. I turned into a mom blob of mass proportions and it sucked.

Why is it that moms think they can give all of themselves to their families and still have any energy left over for themselves? The answer simply is that they can't. Their tank is empty after giving it all to everyone else and they are the ones that suffer.

I'm learning that all my MIL issues over the years was medicated with food. I'm just now realizing that I need to sit down and tell her how I have felt all these years. I hope that it will heal our relationship. If not, then I'll have done my best to make it right.

kid happenings fall 09

"Being a Mama is hard work."--Lia Wilson I hope she remembers that when she gives me a hard time.

"Where are the rest of their clothes?"--Lia while watching Dancing With The Stars

Nathan got the video camera and deleted everything! That will teach us to download things a bit quicker.

Bubba is wearing a hot pink tutu and dancing. He totally rocks it.

Lia says, "Daddy, will you dance with me? It's okay if you aren't a prince and we can just pretend you are handsome."

Nathan said he wanted to brush his teeth and asked for the 'poot taste' instead of the toothpaste.

I love watching Nathan be silly. He fell and skinned his knees so I gave him huge blue band aids. Now he's walking like a mummy so he doesn't mess up the bandages.

fantastic mommy day. Gymnastics and shopping with Lia, snuggles with both kids and then playing in the leaves. Finished off with gourmet pizza for dinner and a good movie. I'm so thankful God chose me to be their mama.

enjoyed my morning with Lia. She says..."Mom, I'm going to lose more teeth, but I won't lose my sweet tooth."

had fun doing craft time with Lia. We painted wooden flowers. "My favorite part is gettin' messy."--Lia Wilson

for future reference: If silly putty ends up on your remote control, it will take a long time to get it off the buttoons. You may want to block off a portion of your day.

members of my family attacked by the Ickies. I thought it best to keep Lia home from church. She cried and cried ..."but I LOVE church and I want to go." Larry is making pancakes to make her feel better. (11/1/09)

enjoyed watching Lia finally master some of her gymanastics, then going with her to spend her tooth fairy money. She bought a cowgirl hat and a stick unicorn.

Nathan just tackled Lia and knocked out one of her teeth. I said, "Nathan, you just knocked out Lia's tooth!" He responded, "Wow, cool!" I guess the tooth fairy is flying by tonight. (10/30/09) tooth #2

"Nathan is being a little bother"..Lia Wilson ( I think she may watch too much Olivia)

thinks Nathan wants to be a thief when he grows up. I keep finding him under the dining table with all the things he's taken from us. Just found him with my camera, Larry's wallet and cell phone.

Had lots of fun partying with Lia's Kindergarten class this morning! Lia hugged me and told me how much she appreciated me organizing her party. Made it totally worth it.

things I never thought I'd say to my kids". My example: Nathan!! Get your head out of the toilet!!

Lia just lost her first tooth--literally. It came out while she was eating a crouton and she swallowed it. Now I have to write a note to the tooth fairy excusing the absence of her tooth from under the pillow, yet still asking for money. (10/25/09)

Lia hears God

Lia: "Mom, God is talking to me."--- Me: "What is He saying?"---Lia: "He's saying to pick up the family room and be helpful."---When she saw the room she says, "Whoa, it's pretty messy. Maybe I only THOUGHT He was talking to me.

They grow up so fast

Lia starts Kindergarten in a couple of weeks. I'm amazed at how quickly she's gone from my sweet baby to my sweet little lady. Sometimes she is so grown and does things way beyond her years. We plan to start her in gymnastics in October. She almost exploded with excitement when we told her. It won't be long before I'm sending her off to college.

Nathan is a mess

A few weeks ago we found Nathan sitting in our bed completely naked painting his man bits hot pink with my fingernail polish. First, the door to our room was closed and he had never gotten in there before. Second, the polish was put away on my nightstand, but he managed to get it anyway.

Now he's started opening closet doors and finding light bulbs and whatever else he could get his hands on. Yesterday I found him holding an empty bottle of hand sanitizer. I freaked! Thankfully most of it was on his pants. I called poison control and they said to give him juice and he'd be fine. Praise the Lord he was.

He's making my hair gray!!